For me, I love the stories that go with them. Moments. I love how people’s faces look, I love the feeling you get when you see someone talk about a moment and just beam from the inside (maybe not even from the outside) or the look of reflection. The reason they are a moment is that they have permanently etched themselves in us. They are left there due to a strong emotion – fear, joy, love, pain, confusion. They were left inside for a purpose. Sometimes it is hard to see the purpose but you have to look.
These things can range from small-to- HUGE. These moments, they stand out bigger then all others, are the real zingers. “Jenny, I have cancer”. “Your mom just took her last breath”.
Those moments make me SPIN, take my breath away, and immediately produce tears, when I think of them. They make my insides ache just like you were back in that exact time. My finding out that I was having each child (pregnancy) was huge…being asked to be married was huge…but somehow the passing of my mom – BIGGER> and seems to be more & more so each year – because you see how that person stopped in that moment and all they are missing out on since. They are missing each little thing that creates those moments.
Today, Three years ago…a women that created so many of my moments passed away. She is missed so much it is incredible. What she left is moments…and one is the biggest one of my life – her death…but instead of dwelling on that – I am going to choose today to remember at how good she was at making other moments GREAT.
She LOVED news, no matter what – oh I passed an exam, I am dating, pregnant, etc… She was the first call you got on special days – Happy Birthday, Happy Anniversary, Happy first day of ….She was YOUR first phone call because she helped create the mood, and that later would make that call a moment. I want to be that person. I want to be the first call…because I am that first call, feeling is the one that makes it all real and worth remembering…I keep going to create moments for my family.
Today mom – I miss you – I treasure you – and I am thankful for you. I will do my best to create little things today that my kids will remember and that in the future, will make me their first call…